Red Pen XXX

I’ve started on my first set of edits for the BBC. In all I have to slice a little over a thousand words out of Cthul-You and elimate all swearing. There is so much swearing in this story that my manuscript now looks like it was attacked by a red pen wielding maniac.

I’m debating whether to just edit out the swear words or instead go the Red Dwarf route and make up some of my own. Smeg, frag and frak are already taken. Theres something emminently naff about swearing that doesn’t actualy offend people. As far as I’m concerned if it doesn’t incite middle England it isn’t worth saying. Joss Whedon gets some incredible swearing into Firefly by having it all in Chinese…hmm…

My producers asked if I have any ideas to voice the story. She also threw in that although Jack Black would be perfect, he isn’t available. Now I can’t get the idea of Jack Black reading Cthul-You out of my head and I’m struggling to think of any other people. It can be pretty much anybody excluding A-List Hollywood celebs. They have to be able to do nihilstic, mid-nineties, generation-X, slacker chic.

Come on people, sugesstions!