Fear | Damien Walter

I did a little whoop of joy, followed by a nod of recognition when I received Gareth L. Powell’s guest post in my email inbox. The first because Mr. Powell is among Britain’s very best science fiction authors. The second because like every writer, I recognise THE FEAR that Gareth describes. You will no doubt recognise it also. Find Gareth L. Powell online at www.garethlpowell.com and on Twitter @garethlpowell

I’m always happy to feature guest posts from fellow writers and passionate readers. Find me on Twitter @damiengwalter

If you want to be a writer, then sooner or later you’ll have to face THE FEAR. However confident you may feel as you start to write your latest novel or story, at some point you’ll look at what you’ve written and hold your head in your hands.

“Give up,” a little voice will whisper in your head. And that little voice is THE FEAR.

THE FEAR will plant questions and doubts in your head. It will tell you that everything you’ve ever written is crap. It will tell you that you’re not a real writer, and that you should quit now before people find out what a talentless hack you really are and expose you as a fraud.

I have spoken about THE FEAR to other writers, and they all recognise it. They all have that inner demon whispering to them in their darkest moments, undercutting their confidence and self-belief. For some, those dark moments are at the beginning of a project, when they’re staring at a blank white page awaiting inspiration. For others, THE FEAR creeps up on them during the editing process, or just prior to submission.

For me, THE FEAR tends to manifest around the halfway point of a novel, when the end seems very far away, and it becomes almost impossible for me to objectively judge whether what I’m writing is any good or not. I start to worry that the characters are jabbering trolls gesticulating their way through a nonsensical plot, and that I’ll never reach the final chapter.

If you let it get hold of you, THE FEAR can paralyse you, leaving you unable to function. The only way I’ve found to fight back is to keep writing; to keep soldiering on until you stagger over the finish line. Only then will you be able to look back with anything resembling objective clarity.

But how do you keep going? How do you keep the motivation going when the voice in your head tells you that you’re wasting your time? You can blot out THE FEAR with alcohol, but that’s only a temporary solution; and most people find it hard to do their best work when they’re smashed.

The only practical way to prevail is to keep your goal in mind. Get in front of your keyboard every day and do the work. Tell yourself that you will finish what you have started. Listen to THE FEAR and learn to identify it. Don’t let it trick you. When it starts sowing its seeds, gather them up and lock them in a quiet corner of your mind. Tell yourself: “This is just THE FEAR talking.” And try to ignore it. Or, if you can’t ignore it, try turning it to your advantage. Harness the nervous energy to make you more productive. Surf that anxiety wave! Tell yourself that you are going to feel THE FEAR, and do it anyway. Keep your eyes on the prize, and keep buggering on until you get there!

Becoming a Brand Versus Writing What You Want to Write(justinelarbalestier.com)
the truth about fear and anxiety(mikedeforbes.wordpress.com)
Finding Your Own Pace(bardicblogger.wordpress.com)

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I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

Bene Gesserit litany against fear

It happens to the best of us. You sit to write and something is wrong. Some voice is saying bad things to you. That thing? That voice? It’s name is fear. It’s telling you you can’t do it. You don’t how to write anymore, if you ever did. Whatever you try and write will be AWFUL. People unfortunate enough to have to read it will mock you and laugh in your face, and they will be right to do so. You don’t have anything to say and anything worth saying has already been said. Which means you are either irrelevant or unoriginal, whichever is worse. Every other person in the world capable of forming symbols with a pen on paper, or even just bashing their head against a keyboard, is better at writing than you are. Give up. Stop. Now. ABANDON ALL HOPE.

You must face your fear. Don’t get up from the desk. Don’t make a cup of coffee. Don’t start sharpening your pencil. ABSOLUTELY UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES CHECK YOUR EMAIL, TWITTER, FACEBOOK OR YOUR BLOG STATS. Face your fear. Sit with it. Listen to it. Say hello to it. “Hello fear. Nice of you to visit today. What can I do for you?” Give your fear a stroke. You’ll find it’s more scared than you are. And before you know it, the fear will turn in to something else. Often, although not always, the central idea of whatever you are trying to write.

Face your fear. And then write.